Ah, daylight saving time, my arch nemesis. The more I think about it, the less it makes sense. OK, I'll buy the reason for it in the US but there's no need for it here. Europe uses a 24 hour clock, so why bother with it? And secondly, when you're this far north the daylight you have isn't worth saving. The world needs to take a lesson from Arizona; it's the 21st century, daylight savings is a thing of the past.

In Europe everyone wears really tight fitting clothes. This is why Europeans seem gay to Americans. My pants are baggy by their standards, they don't know them meaning of the term. If I can't hide a 2 liter bottle of soda in my pants without someone noticing (true story), my pants are not baggy. So maybe tight fitting jeans look better, but they're much less comfortable than American jeans. The air gap between the fabric and my skin makes my legs warmer than with the European pants. Funny, you'd think staying warm would be something the Swedes would appreciate.

My mom had warned me that part of the bicultural experience is a period of disenchantment with the country you're in that happens a month or so into your stay. If you don't get that feeling, then you haven't been fully immersed in the culture. I've been keeping that in the back of my mind since I got here and have been wondering when it would set in, and actually worried that it hasn't yet. Which is just weird being upset that I don't hate Sweden yet. Well, that disenchantment set in just the other day. Sweden is culturally homogeneous. You don't notice it at first since they are all different from you or any American subculture you are familiar with, but once you get past that you realize that the Swedes' love of consensus runs down to the bone. I'll spare you the tirade I had the other day and hope that since I've finally encountered the problem maybe I can adapt and move on, rather than staying mopey for a month, as I was told would happen...

Lately I've been thinking about how much time I've been spending with all the people from V-Dala and how big a part the nation plays in my social life now. I find myself wondering what would have happened if I had joined another nation instead? Would I have met the people I am friends with now? Would the other people I would have met been better or worse than my current friends? My entire social life has been a direct result of my choices. Which made me realize something even more amazing: almost my entire life has been a product of things beyond my control. I wasn't able to choose where I lived, or what schools I went to. I had relatively little control over what classes I would be in, and as a result who I would meet or be friends with. At best my free will was a choice between choosing one predetermined route or another.
The start of college was only slightly better, the nature of being a Theatre Arts major meant that I was still basically following a preset path. It's like Fate, only being consciously aware of it.
It was only when I changed my major that I really felt like I had a say in my own life. Then I chose to go to Uppsala, chose a nation, chose a dojo (or whatever the capoeira equivalent is). I can make life altering decisions now, I mean actually make them, not just pick between doing something or not.
There's supposed to be something scary about the realization that the choices you make are what make your life and not some predetermined course set by Fate. But as I look at it, going to Sweden has been the best thing that's ever happened to me. I find that the destiny I'm making for myself is considerably better than anything Fate ever gave me.

I was at a nation the other night and these two girls walk into the room and are talking to each other in Swedish. One has a normal voice but the other had the most horrific Swedish accent ever. It was like a cross between Dr. Strangelove and the Swedish Chef. All Swedes talk like they're holding a cough drop in the middle of their tongue, but to varying degrees. A Swedish accent can actually be quite soothing, but this was just ridiculous. No matter how drop dead gorgeous a girl might be I could never get with her with a voice like that: Oh Kefeen yuoo meke-a me-a su hut!
Thankfully she looked like Paris Hilton, so no love lost there.

btw, that bit of Swedish is brought to you by the Swedish translator. I find it's especially fun when you put in actual Swedish into it.

On another note, why is it that whenever I leave the country bad things start happening back home? Floods, forest fires, hurricanes, you name it, whenever I go to Europe some catastrophe happens. Can't you people keep it together without me?

Word of the day: trisexual-pertaining to having sex with males, females, and one's self.
Strange that a bi who masturbates then becomes an entirely different classification.

I've started doing capoeira here in Uppsala. It's one of those "I'll try that one day" kind of things, where I had frequently planned on trying it back home but never got around to doing it. Since this whole study abroad thing is the embodiment of doing the things I've always wanted to do, it seemed appropriate. Plus, since it's a non-Asian martial art I get a whole new outlook on it. Which is good because one of the problems I had with my attempt at aikido here was that they did things in a way that it was just different enough to bother me. I doubt I could get very far in my training when I'm silently disagreeing with how aikido "should be". I'm too used to Ko Sho aikido to ever get used to the G-rated stuff they have here.
Capoeira is such a total departure from aikido. The basic philosophies are the most obvious example; aikido is very efficient, you use as little of your own energy as possible, relying on the opponent's energy to power your techniques. Strikes are secondary, joint locks and throws are the primary means of attack. And (ideally) your movements are small, not big sweeping circles. Capoeira relies on your own strength and movement to power your attacks, kicks are the main weapon. You use sweeping motions, feints and ruses to keep the opponent from getting too close.
I find that my years of aikido have created an instinctive stance and movement that is difficult to override, which is bad since these instincts are now antithetical to capoeira. Aikido footwork moves at 45 degree angles, capoeira moves at 90 degree angles. Aikido teaches you to keep both hands in front of you to protect yourself, capoeira has one hand in front of you and one hand out to the side ready to strike. The most difficult difference to overcome is the direction of the foot when the leg is stretched out to the side. In aikido/jujitsu, you have your foot in a sprinting position, but capoeira has the foot flat on the ground. That's something we were explicitly told not to do for various reasons, namely if someone falls on you leg, you knee bends instead of breaks.
I do have to give capoeira props for their unique take on solving the "missing leg" problem. Since we're bipedal we have 2 missing legs, and are not nearly as stable as something quadrupedal. Solution: stay low enough to the ground to be able to catch yourself with your hands if you lose balance and create a stable base when you're attacking. That way you can kick and still have 3 "legs" on the ground instead of one.
And by the end of it I'll finally be able to do cartwheels and walk on my hands.

At the meeting for the Roadtrip to Russia they handed out an extra form to all the American men, and only the American men. The form asked some pretty spooky questions, such as: "Do you have any skills or training including firearms, explosives or nuclear, biological or chemical experience?" and "Have you been in an armed conflict, either as a participant or a victim?" Now, if I say yes to the first one, do they not let me into Russia or do they instantly accept me then kidnap me and lock me in a mountain fortress?
And why aren't Australian nuclear scientists even worth considering? Or female American demolitions experts?
Another reassuring tidbit was, "Every now and then, the Russian police, militia, military, special police or frontier police (armed police) make surprise checks of our buses." Great...

One of the feminist essays we were assigned to read made me wonder if feminists realize how crazy they can sound at times. The essay dealt with sexual imagery being used in the military. I don't mean the Marine Corps, that's a no-brainer, she was insistent that the defense analysts, nuclear strategists and the like were using sexual references to military hardware and tactics. Her examples included the description of a Harrier jet which had "an exceptional thrust to weight ratio" and "vectored thrust capability that makes the...unique rapid response possible." heh heh...they said "thrust." She also claimed that the acronyms for things like submarine-launched cruise missiles, SLCMs, sounded sexual (slick'em, get it?). Ironically, with her fixation on sexual acronyms and references to male genitalia she overlooked the title of one of the people she was studying: SAC commander. If I started snickering anytime someone said 'thrust' or 'missile' when talking about rocket propulsion, people would tell me to grow up, but apparently this essay was taken so seriously it made it into an anthology. 'Made it'(snicker).

I always wondered what the story was with the The Tootsie Pop Indian.

And lastly:
(explaining aikido)
Me: I'd say the best example of why it's important to relax is what happened to my Marine friend.
Feifei: Is he a dolphin or something?

amusing paraphrase and word of the day:
"Poland: the Christ of nations."-Adam Mickiewicz
polonize- to make or become Polish.
So does that mean that when Poland annexed Vilnius it became a polony? Or that in the Middle Ages their goal was polonialism?

To follow up on a previous post, I learned that "jordgubbe" the Swedish word for strawberry has an etymology that makes its literal translation far less disgusting. "Gubbe" used to mean any round, awkward/clumsy thing and was then later used to endearingly refer to an old man. So 'jordgubbe' is an awkward thing from the earth.

Skype. I can finally call home (or anyone at all, really) for an affordable rate. This and several other programs I've downloaded are what make the internet the best thing since the opposable thumb.

Sala (a likely, though unspecified, connection to Uppsala) was fun. An old mining town that provided most of Sweden's silver from the 1600's on. The mine itself was kind of unremarkable, just a massive dark hole in the ground, essentially. I suspect that the guide realized that and tried to impress upon us how incredibly long it took to make all the tunnels and shafts. Still, I was imagining something more visually stunning.
The town itself was gorgeous, the streets and parks were covered in yellow, orange and red leaves. Since it's been unseasonably dry, the leaves don't rot, they stay crisp and fluffy and we were kicking up the big piles on the sidewalks on our way to the mine. The crisp, cool weather combined with the giant trees covered with such brightly colored leaves made it feel like living in a Calvin and Hobbes Sunday comic. Now all I need is a wagon...

The European Union was discussed the other day in my Peoples of the Baltic class, specifically new members and the economic implications. When the idea that Turkey should be allowed to join the EU there was much opposition to the notion, bordering on revulsion. One of the minor reasons was that Turkey is considered part of the Middle East and not Europe. One of the other reasons was that Turks would be a bad influence if they were allowed free passage through Europe, claiming that neighborhoods go downhill whenever Turks move in. Clearly Europeans are not as civilized as they would have everyone believe. The guest speaker explained that Turkey entering the EU would be an economic strain on the other EU members as they would have to invest a large amount of money to bring Turkey to the same level as the rest of Europe. That was the same reason why he said that Russia would not be able to join the EU for a very, very long time; Russian membership would bankrupt the EU.
So, membership in an organization that promotes equal economic footing for all its members has to exclude nations that are substantially poorer. Also, a particularly rich country (Norway) would not want to join such a union if membership would actually reduce their economic strength.
This got me thinking about the economics of the Federation in Star Trek. Since the Federation is largely modeled after unions of nations on Earth, such as the UN and one would presume some of the EU, would the same rules still apply? In Insurrection, they say that they're giving Federation membership to a race that just became warp capable the year before. One must assume that they are nowhere near as economically powerful as, say, Earth. As large as the Federation is, modernizing an entire planet with technology centuries ahead its time and making it economically stable would be financially draining. Would that be where the Prime Directive comes in? Now not just as a rule designed to protect cultures from outside contamination but also relieving the Federation of the obligation to instantly modernize new members, as the EU protects itself from having to equalize economically weaker countries. Would they then create trade barriers with this new member planet to keep the more powerful nations from exploiting it? That doesn't seem like it would ahve happened in this case considering they say that the reason they want the planet to join is because they need all the help they can get to fight a war. Since the race isn't technologically advanced enough to provide military support, the only thing they could really offer are raw materials. So if they can't instantly modernize them and don't have the time to gradually modernize them, the only thing the Federation could do to make use of the planet is to colonize it. That would definitely contaminate their culture , not to mention that colonialism is something Earth supposedly eliminated centuries before. So unless there's another option provided by some alien economic system, this planet and its inhabitants really got screwed.
So, back in real life the EU can't accept Turkey without hurting itself in its obligation to equalize the member nations, it sure as hell can't colonize Turkey, so the only thing that can be done is try to help it improve its economy until it is strong enough to be an EU member. Given that Turkey is roughly the European equivalent of Mexico right now, that might take awhile. And who knows, maybe by that time there won't be as many bigots opposed to Turks in Europe.

Best Dialogue Ever:
Me: Do you know what a fundie is?
Feifei: No, tell me.
Me: Fundamentalist Christian.
Feifei: Ohhh. I thought it meant someone who isn't very intelligent.

Reading Swedish magazines is so much more educational than reading the textbooks, I swear. More interesting, too. I could learn about why Sweden has red houses (it comes from a mine and the color used to be a status symbol) or learn what "godis-bh:n" means (candy bra). Plus with my new vocabulary I can impress, or at least amuse, the locals.

Consensus is very important to the Swedes. If faced with something they don't necessarily agree with they'll simply say "I guess..." I suppose that's to be expected from a country that hasn't been at war since 1814, even when their empire was falling apart they peacefully worked out a solution. That's got to be some kind of record. While it definitely seems to show that the Swedes have a more evolved sensibility than, say, the US, at least when it comes to conflict resolution, they've gotten to the point where they regard any kind of disagreement as something terrible. I had a really minor political disagreement with someone a few weeks ago, just debating semantics really, and the next time I saw her she was kind of closed off. Eventually she asked if we could still be friends after we had an argument. Now, in the US if you stopped being someone's friend because you didn't see exactly eye to eye with their politics you'd lose a lot of friends really quickly. Perhaps Americans are better able to cope with disagreements and live with them rather than just acquiescing.

Surely there's some practical application for a robotic fish.

And if anyone out there uses Firefox, this will make it better. I've noticed that things load anywhere from a few seconds quicker to nigh instantly.

I find that the Swedes, and most of the Europeans really, are never impressed with how hot I tell them Arizona is. I would have expected them to be at least mildly surprised. The only explanations I can think of are they don't think I know the Celsius system and am just spouting out something that sounds right, 45C (113F) doesn't impress them (which I doubt considering they call 85F a heat wave) or they just can't fathom what that temperature actually feels like. They try to regale me with stories about how cold it will get. I'm impressed by sub-zero temperatures (more so in Fahrenheit but Celsius is noteworthy too) but then again cold is fairly exotic to me. Heat just seems more impressive, nothing emphasizes that more than when your breath feels chilly compared to the air.
The wildlife in Arizona, on the other hand, impresses them a great deal. There are potentially dangerous animals, but nothing here is poisonous. There are elk and reindeer way up north, about 100 wolves in the entire country and bears. Sure they're big and intimidating but they're furry and have four legs. And it's not like an elk is going to sneak up on you. I've told people horror stories about the frightening critters you can find in Tucson. Spiders and beetles the size of your hand, scorpions, centipedes (we found one once that was, I swear, a foot long), rattlesnakes, mountain lions with a taste for human flesh, javelinas, Gila monsters. I'm sure I left out something.
The plant life is also worlds apart, walking through the forest you can find all sorts of edible berries, pear trees and if you're into that kind of thing, edible mushrooms. And everything has leaves and bark. In Arizona, the only things that are edible you need to pick the thorns off of first, and everything coming out of the ground is covered in spines. The cactus are easy enough to avoid, except for the sadistic cholla.
One of my hallmates, after asking about nature in Tucson, said "You live in a dangerous place."
I suppose that's true, but it's amazing how quickly you get used to all the pointy plants and animals and all you really mind is the heat.

Oh, and while we're talking about scary things you can't find in Sweden, let's not forget the occasional abandoned nuclear missile silo you can find in the Arizona desert.

School of the Americas by Lesley Gill. Man did this book make me mad. She investigates this training facility for Latin American soldiers in the US and its involvement in human rights violations. The fact that they train soldiers with questionable backgrounds to be more effective soldiers is bad, the fact that the US topples democratic governments to ensure they won't turn communist is bad, but Gill isn't satisfied with this. She goes on to criticize the entire US government, not just the current administration or certain previous administrations but all of American government post WWII. She makes it seem as if communism was something that the US made up as an excuse to interfere in world affairs, forgetting that there actually was a USSR and communist Cuba. Now, how gratuitously anti-American is she? She's so gratuitously anti-American the people in my class from all over Europe thought her criticism of the US was over the top. They said they felt sorry for any American reading it. I found that very refreshing, I expected everyone to think that she was spot on describing the evil American Empire. She had so much to work with in the realm of righteous anger but she just had to accuse all of America of being sadistic Imperialists.

A couple of days ago when I was getting my hair cut the barber asked where I lived. I said Rackarberget (like you'd say it in English), she corrected me, it's "Rackar-berry-et". I've been mispronouncing it for over a month and not a single person has corrected me. Grrr...

Words of the day: mawkish-Excessively and objectionably sentimental. Sickening or insipid in taste.
ombudsman- A man who investigates complaints and mediates fair settlements, especially between aggrieved parties such as consumers or students and an institution or organization. (I'm ashamed to say that a Swede taught me a new English word)